to you...

You keep me waiting so long, my dear..
My heart's been yearning so long to hear...
words of love, that you will speak..
Its said you'll find what you shall seek...
I ask, I seek, and yes I knock..
A door, a boulder, a heavy rock...
That opened not, it never budged...
You mocked, presumed and you judged..
My voice but, you did not hear...
Did you see the drop of tear...?
You wouldn't.. you don't want to see...
Blind, in your aim to achieve...
That which to you is of worth..
Makes you oblivious to my dearth...
Should I then still wait for you...
Or forget it all, and just like you...
A materialistic life pursue,
And pretend to be happy too...?

-Evangeline

Random .. very... and Late...

I'm feeling weird..

ok... 1:56 am and i'm not asleep.. i was making changes in the class blog..

Some people are so stupid.. They irritate you and yet they have to be around..

Sometimes you wish they'd disappear... but then that doesn't happen.. and what happens instead is that.. when they aren't around finally.. you end up reflecting back on how they irritate you.. and THAT irritates you so much more... because it's like this certain level of patience you have has reached long back and now its as if the irritation's overflowing... and it's contained and you'll burst... any moment... but to what effect?? You'll just be more irritated... perhaps feel like pulling off your hair... a Disprin might help here sometimes... but not always...

2:02 am I'm sleepy and not sleepy at the same time... i have to wake up tomorrow for class.. I don't want to wake up..

Yes i want to go to class but i don't want to wake up... i hate waking up early... and if i don't catch my usual train i'd never reach in time for the first class... There are only two classes in a day.. what's the use if you don't reach for the first hour..

oooooh i bought new sandals.. I think I'm going to wear them tomorrow.. Oh yea and I like transparent nail paint..

So by far.. my new footwear is the only good thing happening to me...

I don't think there's a bad thing happening... except maybe a few irritating kind of people who i mentioned earlier...

hmph...

2:06 am .. i think i better go to bed... why are all my friends offline... i wish i had someone to chat with...

2:07am.. still thinking... don't feel like...

Gmail.. 34 unread.. old class reports...

wait let me clear my inbox... brb..

2:14am... cleared :D

Haven't visited my Yahoo mail for long.. it must be cluttered...

ok i think I'm starting to get sleepy...

off to bed .. Signing out... :D ...zzzZZzzz..

Eva

Today morning..

My cousins, from home yesterday...an 8 year old and a 13 year old... I had to keep the internet out of their reach (or sight).. So i just locked everything away and didn't touch it myself :D..

Didn't go to church yet... I 'll go in the evening..
I thought i wanted to sleep, but as soon as everyone left, I pulled out the laptop and connected everything back...

Today might be different :D
Today might be the day ..
A decision shall be taken..
To change everything around
A foundation shall be laid..
to what will be in future..
Mine.

Eva :)

Christmas Eve

Merry Christmas :)

2:37 am.. i just returned from Church after the midnight service..

Admist tons of "Merry Christmas" SMSes flowing in just when it struck twelve, a sleepy me waited for the mass to get over...

It isn't half as good as it were back in Noida... There it used to start a few weeks before christmas... all the carol singing and crib decoration and house visits and cake cuttings. I remember staying back late at the church to practice carols to be sung on Christmas eve during the mass.. I remember Sandra ma'am going over and over again to make each one of us in the choir to get the notes right. And the tea they used to get us .. was like life-saver from the chilling cold and endless practice.

Its just so calm here.. doesn't feel like Christmas used to feel.

But then after a whole year of scattered living.. This is one time my whole(small :P) family is together.. My dad and my sister are back home.. :) It feels good to have them around...

:D Merry Christmas yet again!

The walk..

So, you tread on pebbles when you walk on a road...

I've tread on pebbles too,,,

big ones and small..

I stumble, I fall...

And get myself back on my feet again..

Walk and think I'll be careful this time..

So when I walk, I watch out

At all that is in sight, I doubt..

But now that i watch and doubt and look..

I cannot enjoy the road i took...

I'd rather enjoy, I decide

I cast my doubts, my fears aside

And I stumble on a rock again...

But this one time, I don't complain..

For I decided to stumble and fall..

A bruise it made, really small...

After all what's life without mistakes..

How unexciting without risks you take...

Don't call me careless, do not judge

I have no complaints, I have no grudge..

For my days of crying are long gone..

I don't care, of what's right or what's wrong..

It 'll happen again, I don't fight anymore

The pain's all gone, it hurts no more..

:)

i miss...

I swear, sitting at home is boring...

My PC's still dead, i'm using my dad's laptop..

Oh i never mentioned my PC's dead yeah..

I miss class!

and Christma's still looks far..

I miss Delhi, I miss my church and i reeeeeallly miss carol singing!

Review- The Blessing[Velsignelse]

The Blessing[Velsignelse]

Denmark, 35mm, 75 minutes

Dir: Heidi Maria Faisst

Theme

Motherhood

Review

I feel, the movie juxtaposes two mother-daughter relationships to put across the theme.

While Katrina, in her becoming a mother, finds herself ruined, Katrina’s mother Lise cannot digest the fact that her daughter did not ask her to visit while she was in labour.

Both the daughters need their mothers, but Rosa can’t get hers while Lise supports Katrine as much as she can. Lise is ready ti take care of Katrine’s child when she realizes Katrine can’t.

We see how Katrine cannot come to terms with her new identity or role of a mother. When she looks at herself in the mirror, she finds herself responding with disappointment and surprise at her changed physical appearance.

While talking to her relatives about the delivery, Katrine compares it to the pain of  a “gallstone” being removed from her body. She appears uncomfortable with holding or breast-feeding the child. She even goes on to ask Lise “Can you feel that you love me?” indicating that she can’t feel the same for Rosa.

We see an inner struggle that Katrine goes through in coming to terms with motherhood and her journey through a tough time accepting truth. She decides to run, escape and hide but nothing works till she finally tries herself to work towards building a closer relationship to the child.

Lighting

A lot of scenes involving Rosa and Katrine, in the bedroom are shot with a red tinge on Katrine’s face. Even when Lise and Katrine are in the same room, a paler shade falls on Lise’s face while Katrine’s still seen in the reddish light. This might heighten the mental conflict and anger-like state her mind is in.

The pattern on the wall, often appear like cracks and seem to emphasize Katrine’s frustration.

Camera

The camera appears to be like an intruder watching the moves of the characters . There were noticeable shakes in the camera and an unnatural movement of zooming is used in places.

Narrator

An omniscient, intruder-like narrator.

The Role of the Husband/Boyfriend

As opposed to the conventional idea of the man being more inconsiderate, Andrea, Katrine’s boyfriend and Rosa’s father is extremely supportive, sometimes to fantastical levels.

Not only is he caring, but when Katrine leaves him and the child, he goes in search of her. He makes sure till the end that he sticks by her and takes care of her and the child.

I see a reversal of roles here, with fatherhood rising to a greater level than motherhood.

Pace

The movie was well paced, short, had no flash-backs or fast forwards.